Wo kaufe ich eine Unterhose am Sonntag morgen in Köln?

If you really want to know, the first thing I ran out of were underpants. Which should come as no surprise, as I have been a long time admirer of Spongebob Squarepants. For some reason he wears underpants, which seems square. I mean he is not a square but rather quirky and inventive, but still in underpants.

Why do we wear underpants then?

We wear underpants because we always wore them until we ran out.

The first sign of civilisation is hereby passed down to us. Monkeys see and monkeys do, but humans go to a place apart from the others and invent a space for themselves. The origins of privacy are found in what survives as the meme of the underpants.

It really is not more than the original mantel of our civilization. As babies, helpless and exposed, with no differentiation between external and internal experience, we learned the ins and outs of our human-ness this way.

Bullshit – and somebody had to say this now – the great learning was only concerned with the outs. Of course, we think ourselves in lofty terms, by our contributions to the Great Learning, by our carrying of civilization to greater and greater heights, ever closer and closest to Reason itself.

That is where the underpant-ian lesson comes in: Our first sign of civilization, our first sense of the self, our first output, our privacy; it was and is first found in the our underpants. These are the facts and nothing but the facts, or, our artifact.

This bring to me to Aristotle, who first and foremost thought all this business all the way through. He did not enlighten us, but he traced all movements back to their causes until he ran out of all of them and then postulated a prime mover.

Later, civilisation forgot about Aristotle, went into a deep slumber and when it finally came to, it simultaneously developed the idea of the underpant and re-called Aristotle’s idea of the prime mover as a “primum movens.”

The prime mover, as we understand it today, is not Greek, but Latin. Bullshit – and somebody said this again – this is all Greek to me, which brings us the origin of civilisation, leaves us all alone with “that which moves without being moved” or Aristotle’s ὃ οὐ κινούμενον κινεῖ.

This has to suffice as an introduction. It is a Grundriss for now as I do want to overwork the already overstretched. Just think about it next time you run out of underpants.

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